Back from El Paso and ready to tell my tales!
That frosted donut above? That would be the spare tire on my rental car, mere minutes after having picked it up at the airport. But wait! I'm getting ahead of myself!
The flights from Fort Wayne to Dallas and Dallas to El Paso were fine. Uneventful. Land in El Paso and make my way to the car rental area. Step up and begin the paperwork. Hand over my driver's license and credit card. Swipes the credit card and it's declined. WHAT THE FUCK??! End up calling the credit card company with their phone and see what's up. Turns out the rental car places always run an authorization for $250, even tho I'm driving a fucking plastic rocket that rents for $40 a day. Not knowing this information prior to travelling, I simply made sure I had the hotel cost and rental car cost on the credit card, which was somewhere around $200. FUCK UP #1.
So the car rental dude ends up helping me out and runs an authorization for $150, which promptly goes thru. They set me up in my wheels and I prepare for a Sunday afternoon of cruising El Paso, New Mexico and wherever else I can get my ass to.
Check the maps and hit the freeway. Cruising nicely. Then some dude in a SUV is beside me, honking and pointing to a rear wheel. YES! That could only mean GOOD news, right?? So I pull off at the earliest exit and find a parking lot to safely park. Get outta the car and inspect the rear driver's side tire, and yes, it's completely fucking flat. God knows how long I had been driving on that.
Cell phone in hand, I call the car rental dude at the airport and share my dilemma. He tells me to call the main car rental hotline and go from there. Which I do. And they are nice enough to send out AAA to install the frosted donut you see above. Then it's back to the fucking airport and swap out rental cars. By this point I think I've eaten up 2 hours of my planned Sunday afternoon sightseeing.
After some of the aforementioned sightseeing, I make my way to my hotel to get checked in. They swipe the credit card and it's declined (if you read everything above closely, I don't need to spell it out for ya). Thankfully I had just enough cash in my pocket to pay for the first night at the hotel, leaving me with a couple of bucks for the next day at the jobsite, where I was suddenly fearing having to buy lunch for the guys, now cash-less. FUCK UP #2.
So you're saying, Prowse, why the fuck didn't you just jet over to an ATM and grab some cash? Well, chester, you'll be happy to know that days prior to this trip, I placed all my fundage into a new bank account, with a new ATM card. This same ATM card had failed to work the day after I got it, and with this bank being closed on weekends, there was no way to find out why I was unable to access funds. FUCK UP #3.
So it's now Sunday night - I've got a replacement rental car that's eaten up my available credit, a hotel room I was barely able to pay for, no means of purchasing a decent meal, and a real fear of how I would be able to buy lunch for the guys at the jobsite AND pay for my second night at the hotel.
Monday morning rolls around and I promptly call my bank to find out what's up with the fucking ATM card. Turns out new ATM cards take 2-3 business days to be activated. No, I was not told this information when my accounts were set up. But the bank tries to reassure me that my ATM will in fact be activated and working later that day, so buck up, little beaver!
With that nugget of knowledge, I climb into my replacement rental and join the rest of the Texas fucks in their rushhour mayhem to the project site. Honestly, this is the jewel of the fucking trip. I met all the guys on the site who I've only up to that point talked on the phone or exchanged emails. I walked the site a few times, viewing the construction progress and snapping photos. We also had our weekly progress conference call while I was onsite. Lunch rolls around and everybody has previous engagements! Are you fucking kidding me??!? So I dodged the lunch bullet completely!
As the afternoon rolls on, I've always got that nagging thing in my head that I gotta get my ass to an ATM and see if my trauma is to end or continue. So I say my goodbyes and join the Texas fucks in their rushhour mayhem back into the heart of the city. I cruise my selected ATM and push the buttons, the knot in my stomache growing ever tighter. And wouldn't you fucking know it? The damn machine spews out the cash just like they had promised!
So I dash back to my hotel and pay up for the remainder of my stay. I also fill up the replacement rental car with fuel so I won't hafta bother with it Tuesday morning. Then I grab some drive-thru and return to the relative safety of my hotel room, completely spent from the earlier trauma.
Tuesday - Up buttfuck early, drop off the hotel key and drop off the replacement rental car at the airport. Get checked in for the flights and chill at the gate. Again, the flights were uneventful and found myself back in Fort Wayne just after lunch. Found the car, paid the parking charges and returned to work. It remains to be seen whether that was a good thing or bad thing, as I had weighed the options of just returning home and chilling, or returning to work and trying to get myself back up to speed. Naturally, I returned to work, being the sucker I am.
